He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
