I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
