Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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