So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize
