whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
