i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
