Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
...so i touched it.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
