Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
