Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
