Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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