i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
