Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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