; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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