I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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