hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Randomize
