You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
