the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
