North Korea, Best Korea!
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
thus making me awesome and them whores
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I have already put on my inside pants.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
