Redeem this text for a blowjob
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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