Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Randomize
