South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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