Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize