we have officially lost it.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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