i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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