Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
