I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
