These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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