i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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