Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
