i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
