Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
