Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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