bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
