we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
did i walk over a car last night?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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