I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
