Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
