is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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