drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Randomize
