No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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