He is such a slut. More and more my type.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
