Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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