Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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