Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
There r osticjed everywhere
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize