on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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