Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Randomize
