That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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