well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
