It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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