bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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