Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
