East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
